You’ve been given the news we all dread
There’s no right or wrong way to react when your doctor tells you you’re dying. Everyone responds differently. It’s shocking news that can be difficult to comprehend and hard to bear.
Some people go silent. They can’t believe what they are hearing, and they don’t know what to say or do. Others start to cry, and feel as though they won’t be able to stop. Some become numb, angry or scared. These are all common and natural reactions.
What’s important is that you give yourself the time to take in what is happening. You might need to be on your own. Or you might want to spend time with your partner, family or friends as you come to terms with the news.
As hard as it can be, try not to push your emotions aside completely. At some point, it’s better to express how you feel, even if it’s uncomfortable and difficult to do.
A maelstrom of emotions
Over the first few days, you’ll feel a lot of very strong emotions. It can be quite overwhelming.
The idea that you can’t plan your future, or that you’re leaving behind a partner, children, or other important people in your life, might feel too painful to cope with at times. You might struggle to stop crying or worrying. You might feel that there is no point in doing anything. You might find it difficult to see life going on all around you.
All of this, whilst perfectly normal and understandable, can be exhausting. But many people say that the intensity lessens in time. That doesn’t mean you stop worrying or feeling upset – but the feelings become more bearable. And you’re able to think about your situation – and plan what you want to do – a little more calmly.
It really is good to talk
Sharing your fears and sadness with people you love and trust can be a source of great relief. It could also helps your friends and family to understand more about your situation. Which in turn, can make it easier for them to help and support you.
If sharing your thoughts and emotions is too difficult, and you prefer to keep things to yourself, that’s OK too. This is a very personal time. And only you can choose how you handle things.
If you still feel overwhelmed after some time, you could try speaking to someone outside of your immediate circle of family and friends. Counselling might help. Or there are many organisations that can support you and provide you with information about coping with grief.
Planning your funeral…. Or not
You can plan for your funeral as much or as little as you want to. Some people like to arrange everything, right down to the smallest detail. Some don’t even want to discuss it.
If you do want to discuss and plan your funeral, we’ll be here to help and support you in any way we can. You can arrange an informal chat with one of our team in one of our local offices, or we can come and see you.
Just pop in a see us, or give us a call on 0800 996 1927. We’ll always be there when you need us.
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of them even choose to leave 5 star reviews on our website once they’ve dealt with us,
which is incredibly generous given what they’ve recently went through.
